I’m a jazz guy. I like improvising in front of an audience. I like publishing a post while it’s still only a third finished. It keeps the fire lit under me to get the rest written. I was looking for a blog platform congenial to this method of working. Then I read a PC Magazine article, Succeed At Blogging The Gawker Way. Like a Gawker article, it’s funny, frank and packs maximum useful information into a minimum number of words:
“Get specific. Pick something that interests you. Revel in weird topics. Don’t be afraid to get conceptual. Keep it friendly (and human).”
The article gives Gawker writer Nick Douglas’ reasons for using WordPress as their platform. He’s right, WP is the bomb.
What I like about Gawker prose is that it uses the voices of specific, recognizable humans that inhabit the same reality I do. Gawker and its siblings are like the Stewart and Colbert of blogs.
Blog media gets very recursive. It’s easy to get sucked in to blogging about blogging. Gawker does its share of that, but they’re good humored about it. I especially enjoy their list of blog media cliches, for which they graciously shoulder their share of the blame:
“Best. [ultimate thing or experience.] Ever/Evar. [negative experience, situation, or description]; I just threw up a little bit in my mouth. [purposefully non-ghetto statement], yo. [undesirable conclusion]. Oy. [amazed paraphrase of opposing position]. Seriously? Seriously? What’s next? [outlandish scenario]? I’m looking at you, [example of complaint]. Um, [condescension]? [Undesirable experience] made my [sensory organ] bleed. [x] is the new [y].”
Here are some high points from my Gawker tag on Delicious:
How Rudy Giuliani Soothes Conservative Fears:
“The cross-dressing thing probably doesn’t put your mind at ease. And the fact that I’ve been married three times, once to my cousin, well, even I find that a little creepy. But you know what? 9/11. Also: Firemen! Flags! Kittens with firemen!”
“Searching for Donald Trump in the VIP tent at the Bridgehampton Polo club isn’t hard. The man stands out like he’s written in all caps. TRUMP, says his hair. TRUMP, proclaim his slitty eyes.”
On a great sadness of New York City:
“It’s been such a long wait for all of us! But at last, the World Trade Centre is nearly ready for its opening day. In just a few months, it will be a proud day for all of us in Bahrain.”
From mid-2008, Will Wright To Launch 2005’s Best Video Game This September:
“Wright, the creator of SimCity and The Sims, stepped down from his platinum throne on Mount Olympus to tell Newsweek why it took so long: He had a hard time dumbing down his magical world for human minds.”
I’m Not Addicted To The Internet, I Just Need It Inside Me:
“Imagine having a conversation and being able to invisibly call up instant research. For all practical purposes, you’d be as smart as the Internet (or as dumb as the Internet, but still.) Twelve hours a day online is unhealthy; that’s why I need twenty-four.”
A beautiful caption: Photo of Britney Spears In Tiny Car Makes Us Wistful
On the death of LSD inventor Albert Hoffman:
“When you see him with his white hair and suit and tie, all looking like a Deutsche Bank senior VP, and you realize he couldn’t get his drug legalized, you just shake your head sadly for the stinky, beardy NORML kids on every college campus everywhere.”
We Are The Champions. Of Drugs:
“Shed a patriotic tear, fellow Americans: we are the most drugged-out nation in the world… Suck our woolie blunt smoke, Kiwis!… All it takes is one look at this handy chart to see… did you lock the front door? Did you hear something?”
Sarah Palin, The Life-iest Pro-Life Candidate Who Ever Scared The Crap Out Of Me:
“So by now you know John McCain picked some pretty lady from Alaska as his running mate. Crafty! But you have never heard of her before. No one really has. Sure, she was profiled in Vogue a few months back, but you don’t get Vogue for the articles, and the reason for that is that the Vogue profile totally missed one of the most interesting things about Sarah Palin, which is that she found out her fifth baby had Down syndrome through prenatal testing and she went ahead and had him anyway. Do you know how many people do that? Ten percent of people do that… There are many many people, a silent plurality I would even venture, who believe abortion is technically a kind of murder, but that it should stay legal anyway.”
Your Guide To the Endless Newsweek Story on the Endless Campaign:
“In short, this is the story of the 2008 campaign: the Hillary Clinton campaign was a stressful psychodrama, the Obama campaign was an intellectual exercise, and the McCain campaign was a ragtag bunch of misfits who stumbled into an insane family nightmare from Twin Peaks, Alaska.”
“On one hand, we’ll get to see The Roots on TV every night; on the other hand, Black Thought opening for Jimmy Fallon every night is the cultural equivalent of Miles Davis playing his horn on the subway platform to back up a semi-trained dancing spider monkey.”
Barack Obama’s Secret Identity Revealed: Boring Yuppie
“Barack Obama — he’s just like us, if you’re a constitutional law professor married to a lawyer.”
White House Memo: Please Damn Bush With Faint Praise
“The single nicest tribute to the man from roughly January through November of this year came from Oliver Stone. But, post-election, post-John McCain, mid-Sarah Palin, Republicans are grudgingly, mildly complimentary of the inept man-child president they used to love. The nice thing about the Republican media machine is that they generally repeat their talking points verbatim instead of, like, reworking them to sound original.”
My online presence aspires to the condition of Gawker.